HOSTED BY MIKE IVATT AND ANGELA DYE

Shamim de Brún reads her own work- On Top of Them

Shamim de Brún studied acting as an undergraduate and is also studying journalism for her MA. Shamim is currently working on Unprotected Texts, a play. She is the fifth generation of her family to live in Dublin. Shamim also writes poetry.

Transcript


On Top Of Them


It’s happening in my sleep. 
 
Yes, I was sleeping.  
 
Sleeping sound and still
and quiet.  
Till the 
creep- creep- creep  
of  
sneak- sneak- sneak  
into a  
Shouldn’t. Wouldn’t. Didn’t.
 
Did it? 
 
Yes, I was asleep.  
 
And there was green all around me. 
 
I was wrapped in Green when 
creep-creep-creep unseen in dark with curtains closed, and I think I was 6 years old?  
 
And no! I didn’t see anything but the dark-
dark- dark. But the timing of my heart- heart  and the smart part of me staying still until…Ugh… 
 
and creep… creep… creep…  
 
I couldn’t get back to sleep.  
 
The next night?  
Wash, rinse, repeat,  
 
Is that it?  
The truth of memory 
or  
am I remembering the nightmares it gave to me?  
 
It’s all fuzz-fuzz-fuzzy 
because I thought he loved me.  
He should have. 
 
Or did I think he’d kill me? 
Am I just being-  
‘Stupid,stupid-
Silly?’ 
 
Do you think that maybe I will 
kill me? 
Willingly relinquish this life to just be free of my inability to  sleep-sleep- sleep.  
in Green or at Home
or with Curtains or
Alone.  
 
Do you think I’ll ever
sleep-sleep-sleep? 
Like normal people
in beds  
and 
not on top of them? 
 
 

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The Blue Nib believes in the power of the written word, the well-structured sentence and the crafted poetic phrase. Since 2016 we have published, supported and promoted the work of both established and emerging voices in poetry, fiction, essay and journalism. Times are difficult for publishers, and The Blue Nib is no exception. It survives on subscription income only. If you also believe in the power of the written word, then please consider supporting The Blue Nib and our contributors by subscribing to either our print or digital issue.

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